People Watching
Posted on July 12, 2007 | Filed Under Attracting People, Body Language, Communication
One thing that has always interested me is people watching since the people you see are different every where you go. I think what is so fascinating about people watching is just what you pick up when you do it. We are all so different in countless ways that no two people have quite the same mannerisms and I think we can learn not only more about others but also about ourselves by watching other people go about their daily lives.
If you are interested in attracting people I think by people watching you can learn more about the process as you watch others interacting. When I say people watching I don’t mean it as a type of stalker behavior but simply something to do when you might be otherwise just killing time. Although there is certainly nothing wrong with going for a walk or sitting on a park bench and people watching. If however, you decide to follow someone home, well that is something else entirely different and please don’t tell the police the guy from attractingpeople.com told you to do it when they arrest you.
The other day I was at the new Bangkok International Airport waiting for my brother to arrive for a visit when his plane got delayed by several hours. I have used the new airport a few times previously so I had already had quite a good look around the terminal so I decided to take a seat in a great position so I could see my brother as he walked from the customs area out into the arrivals area. I say it was a great position as I was able to spend some time people watching as people exited from customs into Thailand and I tried to imagine how they were feeling as they arrived in hot and humid Thailand by the way they looked, acted and were dressed.
What struck me immediately as I began people watching was how different people acted as they arrived in a foreign country. Some people looked excited and this was blatantly obvious, while others looked confused or even unhappy. I saw people meet their friends and family at the airport with hugs and kisses while I also watched couples scream and argue with each another as they walked into the outside terminal.
One thing that I noticed as a trend was how most seasoned business travelers (you could tell by the suit) were cool, calm and collected, not fazed at all by local taxi drivers desperately hassling the passengers as they disembarked from the terminal. On the other hand you could see the obvious first timers confused whether these taxi drivers were legitimate or not. I really wanted to tell them to go outside as you will get a taxi off the rank for a quarter the price of these taxi sharks but that’s really none of my business.
There were numerous young Thai girls waiting for their often much old foreign boyfriends to arrive and would jump all over them as they walked into the terminal. It was funny to watch the reactions of some guys as they welcomed the friendly gesture while others gave a stern faced grin without any emotion to the waiting young girl.
By people watching it makes you think about how you would or do react when you are in a similar position. You can often see yourself in the mannerisms of other people and by watching them and the reaction they get from those around them gives you a good indication if you like what you see.
One thing I have often noticed while people watching is exactly how much you affect other people when you smile and give them the impression you are happy to see them. Smiling is one way that seems to pick up everyone else’s mood. I saw the opposite thing happen at times as I watched several young girls waiting patiently with a big smile for their man to arrive only to be disheartened by the hard or almost angry look on his face as he arrived. Of course you don’t know the history behind why people act the way they do but you can pick up pointers on how you want people to feel when you look at them.
Whether you are aware of it or not, the expression on your face as you interact probably has a more profound affect on those around you than the words that come out of your mouth. It is the non verbal communication that is the first thing someone picks up on before you even speak. By people watching you get a real good glimpse into what works and what does not work when it comes to having a positive affect on other people. You may even become more proficient at attracting people in your own life by watching the mannerisms of those around you.
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