Attracting Friends

Posted on February 28, 2007 | Filed Under Attracting Friends 

Have you ever noticed that the type of people you have as real long term friends are the ones who are usually on the same general wavelength as you? When I use the word “real”, I mean they are the type of friends you will most probably be friends with for life. Even if you moved away from eachother geographically, you both know you will always share a bond of friendship on some level. They might even be very different to you in many ways, they may even contrast with your own personality but you share similar ideals and live by a similar moral code. These types of friends are the ones you consider your “best” friends. There are however, other types of friends we attract also. 

We know who our best friends are but what about all our other friends and acquaintances, where do they fit into our friendship circle? Some people become our friends to fill certain gaps in our personality. This is why you will sometimes find extremely confident people having friendships with people who are generally shy or more sensitive. Both fill a gap in eachothers personality in some way. There is nothing wrong with this, it is simply a natural part of life as both parties take something from the friendship. The same scenario often applies with very fit, beautiful women making friends with more average looking or overweight friends, or heterosexual men who are friends with gay men, they merely compliment eachother in different ways than their other friends who may be very much similar. It’s healthy to interact with different friends on all levels as it only serves to help you grow on an individual level.

If you are looking to attract new friends you need to first take a look at yourself from the inside so to speak. When attracting people into your life you need to understand that like is attracted to like. Although people can have all sorts of different personalities, people are attracted to people vibrating around the same level. It might seem odd to use the word vibrating but that is exactly what we do, we all vibrate at slightly different rates. Everything in the universe is made up of energy, it is a proven scientific fact and all forms of energy are distinguished by their own unique frequency or vibration. People are attracted to people who vibrate at around the same rate.

Your rate of vibration is directly related to your habitual thinking pattern or thoughts. If you are generally a happy, optimistic person you will have a relatively high rate of vibration. People who are quite negative and think pessimistically have a lower rate of vibration. You will attract into your life others who are vibrating on a similar level and these are the people you are most likely to become friends with.

As we all know some friendships don’t always last for what may seem to be on the surface, a number of different or complex reasons. The truth of the matter on a subatomic or quantum level is that when our friendships dissipate or fall apart it is often due to the level of vibration between the two parties becoming dissimilar. The reason this happens is not scientific it is simply because people change. It doesn’t mean that one person is better than the other it just means that one person is moving in a different direction than the other and this is a normal part of life. The unfortunate thing is that when this happens the two parties may sometimes turn against eachother because many people have very fragile egos. This is why it’s best to just walk away when a friendships dissolves, go your own way and wish the best for that person. If you get caught up in the petty affairs of a fragile ego you are doing nothing more than causing unnecessary mental stress on yourself when you could easily let go of the situation and see it for what it really is, which is simply a matter of two people moving on and let it go at that.

When you are looking for new friends expect to find them as other versions of yourself and if you seem to attract the type of people you don’t want in your life, it’s time to take a closer look at what you are emanating towards others. This is something only you know about yourself. I remember years ago I had a group of mates I used to play tennis with on the weekends. One of those guys was always complaining about how everytime he met a new girl he would date her for a while and then find out later she was cheating on him. It was a bit of a joke between the rest of us as we knew that this guy deserved exactly what he was getting because he was notoriously unfaithful to all his girlfriends. When we mentioned this very obvious point to him he would always respond with the same answer “but she doesn’t know about the other girls”. Well the truth is she may very well not know about the other girls but that’s not the issue. The issue is he is attracted to girls who are just like him, he was generally a good guy but he had a dark secret when it came to remaining faithful and in just the same way, the type of girls who gravitated towards him were also unfaithful.

The story I just mentioned is just an example of a situation that I have noticed in my life but it doesn’t necessarily mean that unfaithful people are attracted to other unfaithful people, I just wanted to explain how attraction works in simple terms. In most cases it is not quite so clear. Let me give you another example.

A friend was telling me a story about someone he knew that managed to embezzle a lot of money from a company in Australia and move to Thailand without being caught. This same guy left his wife and young children behind in Australia when he left the country giving them no money and never again helping to support them after he left. After arriving in Thailand he set up a business with a seemingly nice Thai girl and a couple of years later they got married and bought a house. In Thailand it is not legal for foreigners to own houses or land so everything they owned together was in her name. Their business prospered and after 5 years they were doing great, both in their relationship and financially. However, just after the 5 year point, his “loving” wife dropped the bombshell he never saw coming. She told him to get out of “her” house and don’t ever come near “her” business ever again. The bottom line was that she had played him from the beginning and cleaned him out during her 5 year plan. Looking back at the situation, it was almost a carbon copy of what he had done by embezzling money from his company and then leaving his wife and children with nothing.

The point I’m getting at is you will attract the type of friends who are most like you on an inner level. You may seem like complete opposites and we have all heard the saying “opposites attract”, well that’s not entirely true. You may be opposites on the outside but on the inside you are emitting a similar vibration and this is what draws you to certain people and these are the people who you will attract as friends. One way of gaining a better perspective on yourself is to take a look at your closest friends, they are a great indicator in regards to who you really are.

Comments

One Response to “Attracting Friends”

  1. Kate on June 24th, 2007 3:23 pm

    Thanks

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